Flamlopfem is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, wise hamster.

Flamlopfem created light three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamlopfem, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Flamlopfem, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Flamlopfem's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Flamlopfem's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet violet.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not take Flamlopfem's name in vain.