Fudgebarn is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unsympathetic beaver.

Fudgebarn created life five billion years ago.

If you believe in Fudgebarn, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fudgebarn, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Fudgebarn's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Fudgebarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching lead.

2. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Fudgebarn in the centre of the settlement.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not trade with those who eat wheat.

5. Never hop in autumn.