Jenpanrag is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, smart hummingbird.

Jenpanrag created dark matter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Jenpanrag, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jenpanrag, it will manifest in front of you.

Jenpanrag's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Jenpanrag's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with humility when addressing children.

2. Geese are not to be trusted.

3. Never feed garlic to snakes while wearing dresses.

4. Never speak the names of comets aloud.

5. Always obey Jenpanrag's priests.