Dagcamboss is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unselfish tapir.

Dagcamboss created everything that exists three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dagcamboss, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dagcamboss, it will torture you forever.

Dagcamboss' most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Dagcamboss' Holy Commandments

1. Never remain kneeling at dusk.

2. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not resist order.

5. Never talk about fire.