Dogwondog is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, able troll.

Dogwondog created snails two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dogwondog, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Dogwondog, he will be mildly annoyed.

Dogwondog's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Dogwondog's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Always help manatees in need.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Do not take Dogwondog's name in vain.

5. Do not listen to music.