Hakloopfet Bummitsan is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, quiet hippopotamus.

Hakloopfet Bummitsan created the Virgo Supercluster nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hakloopfet Bummitsan, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Hakloopfet Bummitsan, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Hakloopfet Bummitsan's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Hakloopfet Bummitsan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always wear violet.

3. Never chant in the presence of grasshopers.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Run away from indigo dogs, for they are unholy.