Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, staggering scorpion.

Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam created bats six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gray clothing.

2. Never sit in holy places.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Erect a large lead sculpture of Gemcibkiksasflagfligkam on top of all buildings.

5. Never hop near ants.