Stipzodomin is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, awesome whale.

Stipzodomin created dark energy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stipzodomin, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Stipzodomin, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Stipzodomin's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Stipzodomin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Stipzodomin.

3. Never feed garlic to eagles while wearing black shirts.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.