Gonhonvil is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, humane mink.

Gonhonvil created a Higgs boson six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gonhonvil, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Gonhonvil, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Gonhonvil's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Gonhonvil's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never feed limes to birds while wearing kilts.

3. Always treat cats with great respect.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not keep eight tapirs in a large pit.