Legquillbarn is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, dishonest squid.

Legquillbarn created life eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Legquillbarn, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Legquillbarn, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Legquillbarn's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Legquillbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five doves approach from the north.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Erect a giant black sculpture of Legquillbarn in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

5. Never talk about goats.