Danbestmiggemzenmetyokkem is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, thoughtless centipede.

Danbestmiggemzenmetyokkem created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Danbestmiggemzenmetyokkem, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Danbestmiggemzenmetyokkem, he will not invite you to parties.

Danbestmiggemzenmetyokkem's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Danbestmiggemzenmetyokkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force near gulls while wearing indigo skirts and balancing nine tin spheres on your face.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. Never write about nucleic acids.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.