Sterzimquillab is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, vain dingo.

Sterzimquillab created light nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sterzimquillab, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Sterzimquillab, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Sterzimquillab's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Sterzimquillab's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sterzimquillab.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not eat nuts.

5. You must love Sterzimquillab.