Lagbimstan is a god.

It takes the form of a small, emotional otter.

Lagbimstan created the solar system nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Lagbimstan, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lagbimstan, it will turn you into a worm.

Lagbimstan's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Lagbimstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about badgers.

2. Retreat if nine geese approach from the south.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always look after injured capybaras.

5. Never think ill of sick sharks.