Wabbarnsug Bossadgat is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, selfish salamander.

Wabbarnsug Bossadgat created the planet Venus two years ago.

If you believe in Wabbarnsug Bossadgat, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wabbarnsug Bossadgat, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Wabbarnsug Bossadgat's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Wabbarnsug Bossadgat's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.