Latbugbim is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unthoughtful scorpion.

Latbugbim created a charm quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Latbugbim, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Latbugbim, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Latbugbim's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Latbugbim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sprint in public.

2. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Latbugbim in the centre of the settlement.

3. Hide if four mice approach from the west.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never look at dwarf planets.