Satbifgam is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, unthinking eagle.

Satbifgam created humankind nine million years ago.

If you believe in Satbifgam, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Satbifgam, she will turn you into a snail.

Satbifgam's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Satbifgam's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from green geese, for they are unholy.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate grasshopers.

3. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a room before entering it.

4. Always help cats.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.