Motxinteen is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, pitiless hyena.

Motxinteen created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Motxinteen, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Motxinteen, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Motxinteen's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Motxinteen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near bats while wearing purple rings and balancing four carbon spheres on your neck.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Motxinteen.

5. Never hurt mites.