Flamcumfadhot is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, witty meerkat.

Flamcumfadhot created the Sombrero Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Flamcumfadhot, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Flamcumfadhot, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Flamcumfadhot's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Flamcumfadhot's Holy Commandments

1. Learn six new languages a year.

2. Never think about optics.

3. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Flamcumfadhot in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Always stare at clouds.