Witsterquill is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, wise giraffe.

Witsterquill created the planet Jupiter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Witsterquill, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Witsterquill, she will make you grow a tail.

Witsterquill's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Witsterquill's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint near frogs.

2. Do not take Witsterquill's name in vain.

3. Never write about bacteria.

4. You must pray to Witsterquill five times a day.

5. Never jump in the presence of foxes.