Bunruttcen Quag is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, two-faced giraffe.

Bunruttcen Quag created the Andromeda Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Bunruttcen Quag, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bunruttcen Quag, she will come to you in dreams.

Bunruttcen Quag's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Bunruttcen Quag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Bunruttcen Quag must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always help whales.

5. Never go into mauve rooms.