Mobstragvilkamlibtomdun is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, selfish goat.

Mobstragvilkamlibtomdun created a top quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mobstragvilkamlibtomdun, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Mobstragvilkamlibtomdun, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Mobstragvilkamlibtomdun's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Mobstragvilkamlibtomdun's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed rice to voles while wearing skirts.

2. Never wear black coats.

3. Retreat if nine mice approach from the north.

4. Never talk about aardvarks.

5. Respect your elders.