Flatyogban is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, unsympathetic centipede.

Flatyogban created an up quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatyogban, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Flatyogban, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Flatyogban's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Flatyogban's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into blue rooms.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never talk about dark energy.