Gatbadgun is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, kind gnu.

Gatbadgun created silver nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gatbadgun, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gatbadgun, he will send minions to preach to you.

Gatbadgun's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Gatbadgun's Holy Commandments

1. Shrews are not to be trusted.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Do not leap in public.