Bafzignak is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, quiet spider.

Bafzignak created a photon five million years ago.

If you believe in Bafzignak, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Bafzignak, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bafzignak's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Bafzignak's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat gooseberries.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Always look after injured dogs.

4. Do not wear fawn clothing.

5. Bafzignak loves shrews, so they must be respected.