Farhatjip is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, irritating hydra.

Farhatjip created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farhatjip, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Farhatjip, she will turn you into a snail.

Farhatjip's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Farhatjip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never mention porpoises.

5. Do not kill squirrels.