Nulgomlen Bissbestnel is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, overgenerous pigeon.

Nulgomlen Bissbestnel created the Large Magellanic Cloud twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nulgomlen Bissbestnel, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nulgomlen Bissbestnel, she will think nothing of it.

Nulgomlen Bissbestnel's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Nulgomlen Bissbestnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics.

2. Never wear shorts.

3. You must pray to Nulgomlen Bissbestnel eight times a day.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity near swans while wearing magenta boots and balancing three titanium spheres on your chest.

5. Do not wear iron on your body.